Sex And Intimacy At Every Age
MIAMI (CBSMiami) – “How you can actually improve sex during pregnancy?” asked a Miami woman.
“You know sometimes you want, sometimes you don’t,” said her friend.
“How would I find someone to have sex with?” another Miami woman demanded to know.
“Sex is happening!” Iris Krasnow should know. After interviewing over 150 women of all ages, doctors and sex therapists, this journalist has written a book titled “Sex After…”
“This book is called Sex After. But the sub-head is really the most important part of the book, how intimacy changes as life changes,” explained Krasnow.
“And I just think it’s perfect. It’s great. Because sex is what moves us,” Miami resident Edwin Cano said.
“I think that the women over 70 who have told me… and the majority of them are from Florida, I gotta tell ya, that they’re having the best sex of their lives,” Krasnow declared.
Krasnow is busting myths.
Myth #1: Teens and twenty-somethings are part of today’s “hook up” generation having what Krasnow said many adults fear is random, loveless sex. But she discovered something else.
“Yes they want sexual pleasure but you know what? They want emotional commitment and love,”
Myth #2: Motherhood is blissful.
“You’ve got a squalling baby,” Krasnow pointed out. “I’m not sleeping. I don’t want to have sex. I’m 50-pounds overweight and I have postpartum depression.”
But the doctor has said you can resume sex after six weeks and your man is counting the days!
“I’ve had women tell me they wish they’d said six-years! I’m so tired,” she explained.
Myth #3: In the 50s and 60s, after women have had the babies and raised the kids, they close the shop to sex.
Krasnow is adamant. “OMG! The shop is so not closed! Yes I’ve talked to people over the age of 50 who have very low libido and who aren’t interested in sex any more. It’s not that women wither up and dry up after menopause. Sometimes guys don’t want it either.”
“Another myth is that people want… and I don’t know how else to put this… but rock hard, whammo sex! I’d like to release everyone from feeling like someone else is having better sex, more sex or more perfect sex,” said Krasnow.
In fact, Krasnow has a whole chapter devoted to Adventures in Outercourse.
“And outercourse is everything but! Even if it’s just holding hands or a kiss or a nuzzle it’s so life affirming,” Krasnow pointed out.
“You know one of my women, septuagenarian women,” Krasnow relayed. “She said you know there’s a sweetness to sex after 70, and really connecting soul to soul not organs to organs.”
In fact, like everything the Baby Boomers have transformed, Krasnow insisted that boomer women are re-inventing sex after 60.
“We’re the generation who is watching Mick Jagger writhing on stage in his 70s and he looks pretty good,” Krasnow maintained. “So we’re not going to grow old knitting in our rockers. We’re going to be rocking grannies!”
Krasnow said her biggest surprise was that women over the age of 60 were more confident, fulfilled and relaxed about their bodies, their self-esteem, sex and sexuality, than women in their 20s and 30s. They were also more open to experimentation and adventure.