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'None Of Us Want To Cover This, But It's My Job': CBS4's Lauren Pastrana On Returning From Maternity Leave For Coronavirus Coverage

MIAMI (CBSMiami) -- The main question I have received all this week and in the days leading up to my return is... Why now? Why in the middle of a global pandemic would I go back to work?

The simple answer is because my maternity leave was over. This was when I was scheduled to return to work, pandemic or not. I'm lucky enough to work for a company that allowed me to enjoy 15 weeks of fully paid leave. Yes, I know how rare that is and that I am lucky to have such incredible benefits.  I know not everyone has the ability to take such a long leave without worrying about the loss of income.

I don't take that for granted. Not once was I pressured to return early. In fact, I wasn't pressured to return at all. Despite the constantly growing and evolving nature of this story and the need to cover it thoroughly and thoughtfully, there were no urgent calls, texts or emails asking when I'd be back. I knew when my leave was up and I prepared myself and my family for our new normal. I had a job to do and I was ready to do it.

March 23 was determined as my return date way back in November. I knew I'd be "missing" the Super Bowl in Miami and the primary election in Florida. And truth be told, I was a bit sad to be missing those events as journalist. I love my job and I feel privileged to have a front row seat to important moments  in our community so I can share them with our viewers.

But a pandemic? I'd gladly miss that. I think it's safe to say none of us "want" to cover this. But the thing is, this is my job. No, this is my career and my calling. And while I may not be as "essential" as a doctor or nurse or paramedic or firefighter or police officer, or even a grocery store employee... I truly feel this job is important and I'm honored to do it.

Some have asked why I would put my family at risk for work. To those people my only response is: "Why is my health and that of my family more important than the health of my coworkers and their families?" During my leave, people had to fill in for me. People had to work extra shifts and wake up before dawn, so I could enjoy precious time with my family. Those people deserve a break, too. If I wasn't here right now, someone else would be.

But we are a team, and we are in this together -- now and always. I'm taking the same precautions we've been preaching on TV. If I'm not at the TV station, I'm at my house. I wash my hands constantly and wipe down surfaces. I maintain a social distance from my co-workers. It helps that my boss is in the so-called "trenches" with us.

She makes sure the newsroom and everyone in it has sanitizer, wipes and gloves. She checks on how we're feeling and encourages us to go home the moment we're done with work so as to not prolong the possibility of exposure. I am grateful to her as well as my other colleagues -- both at the station and working from home -- for all they are doing to make these newscasts happen every single day.

For those who said it must be hard to leave my baby at home during this time, I counter with this: It's hard to leave a baby at home anytime! Mom guilt was a "thing" long before "COVID-19" was. Even under the best circumstances, returning to work after having a baby is filled with stress, anxiety and a host of other emotions. I'm grateful to have people at work and at home who understand that and are here to help me cope, not to make me feel guilty or judge my choices.

They are here to lift me up and support me. It is difficult during these uncertain and unprecedented times to not be home cuddling my kids, not just my baby, but my 5-year-old son, too. He has a lot of questions. He wants to know when he can go to school and baseball practice and see his friends. We are figuring out homeschooling and virtual learning just like every one else. And that's the key here. This isn't just hard for me. This is hard for everyone! Whether you're a parent with a newborn at home or a son or daughter with an aging or immuno-compromised parent you're concerned about, we are all navigating through this challenging time together.

I know for the most part these questions about my return come from a place of kindness and concern. So please know this: that same concern you feel for me and my family, I feel it for this community and our incredible viewers.  And while it may seem strange that I returned to work at a time when we are telling people to stay home, please remember South Florida is my home. You all are my neighbors. And I'm just trying to do my part to keep our community informed and safe.

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