Over the past several years, Christopher Nolan’s seminal Batman movies have not only been examples of great superhero movies, but arguably great cinema as well. It’s no wonder, then, that 2012’s The Dark Knight Rises was met with extraordinary expectations. Similarly, the 2013 Patriots entered the season highly regarded – as they do every year that both T-Brads and Bill Belichick are on staff. So which of these highly anticipated juggernauts delivered?
Tale of the tape
New England Patriots Vs. The Dark Knight Rises
|“YEAHHHH!”* (*BUT only for Patriots fans)||Initial Excitement?||“WOOOOO!”|
|"Why...are we struggling against the Bills and the Jets?"||Vague Sense of Worry?||"Why...is Bruce Wayne hobbling around a broken down apartment?"|
|Handsome-yet-ruffled protagonist, still arguably in his prime, yet possessing some silly, silly hair. Whines kind of a lot.||Leading man?||Handsome-yet-beaten down protagonist, well past his prime, but still hoping to make a difference.|
|Man...Rob Gronkowski sure does spend a lot of his life injured.||Growing Sense of Worry?||Man...Bruce Wayne sure does spend a lot of this movie injured.|
|No, which stinks, because even retired, he’d be their 2nd best receiver - maybe their best receiver - in 2013.||Features Hines Ward?||With gusto!|
|Something, something, Aaron Hernandez, something.||Unsettling Level of Violence?||That time that everyone in the stadium died...except Hines Ward.|
|Bernard Pollard.||Secret Supervillain||That silly-voiced fella who gets taken down by Anne Hathaway.|
|[Emperor Palpatine] Bill Belichick.||Wise Mentor?||Michael Caine!|
|Cutting Wes Welker!||Most Illogical Move?||Announcing comeback by burning a gasoline bat into the Brooklyn Bridge. That probably took way more time than it needed to, Bats.|
|It’s looking that way, but the season is still early.||Secretly Lousy?||Yeah.|
The winner is
More Tales of the tape
Tale Of The Tape: Football vs. Futbol
With the World Cup still going strong and the NFL just weeks away from getting started it seemed like a fun idea to compare the two sports that share the same name…sort of. From the global “futbol” to the American “football” these sports are two of the most popular in their own right. As somewhat of a disclaimer I will add that this Tale of the Tape is being written by an American, though I am a big soccer fan. That being said, let’s start the debate.
Tale Of The Tape: World Cup Vs. Olympics
There are very few worldwide occurrences that captivate fans of every nation the way that the Olympics and World Cup have proven to do. When the time comes for either event you can bet that the majority of the world shifts their attention to these amazing month-long competitions. 2014 has been a great year for fans of the Olympics and the World Cup as both took place in the span of just a few months. With the World Cup still going strong and the Olympics fresh in the minds of fans across the globe, let’s see how they match up when placed side-by-side.
Tale Of The Tape: Winter Olympics In Sochi Vs. FIFA World Cup In Brazil
With both sites having their share of issues in hosting major international sporting events, we went to the tape to decide who was the worst host of 2014.