Sports Agenda For Wednesday (8/24/11)
Big Story:
Yknow, sometimes I wonder if Dolphins general manager Jeff Ireland knows he's done after this season and is just trying to get fired. Plus, the Marlins general manager and CEO should be fired, and college football is nigh!!!!
Let's hit this agenda harder than opponents do Marlins pitchers.
Dolphins:
I had a firsties written, but it was just a rant about traffic, like we don't all know how bad that is in S. Florida!!!
The Miami Dolphins decided they didn't quite like the makeup of their running back corps, so they signed Larry Johnson on Tuesday.
Wait, what?
I suddenly channeled my inner Harry Doyle from Major League and said, "I don't know what the hell they're thinking."
Larry Johnson? What is this 2005?
Look, Larry Johnson was good for two years in Kansas City in 2006-2007. Since then, he hasn't played in more than 14 games in a season and hasn't rushed for more than 875 yards in a season.
He's a 6'1", 235 pound running back who hasn't played in more than 2 games since 2009, when he played in 7 games in Cincinnati.
In 2010, Johnson ran for exactly 2 more yards than I did in the NFL.
Maybe he has something left in the tank, and probably signed for the veteran minimum.
But still, is he that much of an upgrade over Ricky Williams. I would say no, and the Baltimore Ravens seemed to agree with me, and I trust their personnel decision ten times as much as I do the Dolphins.
Johnson is best known for calling reporters homophobic slurs as he left Kansas City and yelling at anyone who would listen about his unfair treatment in KC.
His former coach said about him in I think it was 2004 that he needed to "take the diapers off," referring to his immaturity.
So here's what we have: a 31-year-old washed up running back; has attitude issues; has blamed everyone but himself for his lack of production when he was playing in 2008 and 2009; and was so bad last year the Redskins cut him…the freaking REDSKINS!!!
Plus, what does this say about Daniel Thomas, the highly-touted second-round pick.
Thomas was supposed to be the Thunde to Reggie Bush's lightning. Thomas is now playing on special teams during the preseason.
If Thomas isn't the guy, is Larry Johnson really the answer?
Look, I know making personnel decisions with a salary cap is tough, but why is it that teams like the Jets, Ravens, Patriots, Saints, Colts, Packers, and Steelers always get it right; and teams like the Dolphins, Bengals, and Raiders always get it SOOO wrong.
And if Thomas isn't the guy, what does it say about the Fins' ability to draft past the opening round?!
Marlins: (doubleheader vs. Cincinnati Reds, first game, 4:05 p.m.)
At this point, if the Marlins were a racing horse, they'd be turned into glue.
They are past EPIC FAIL and are screaming towards the MOST EPIC FAIL.
Seriously, if you're a Marlins fan, the best news is that there are I believe only 13 more games at Sun Life Stadium.
After that, the team will have a totally new ballpark to suck the life out of baseball fans in Florida.
If you're a fan looking to go to the Marlins games right now, here's a suggestion: call your best friend up, tell them to grab their hammer and come hit you in the head with it over and over again, you'll be much better off.
And if you're hit enough times and suffer enough brain damage, you could be in line to take over the Marlins roster decisions!
UM:
Not much on the UM front, but there are now rumors that the NCAA may be giving other players immunity if they talk to them.
In other words, ruh-roh!!!
